Our BIG new addition

Our family has expanded! We adopted a new four-legged baby from the giant breed rescue last week. We had been working with them for a while--they have a pretty detailed application and adoption process. Once we were approved, though, it went pretty quickly. We drove across the state of Colorado to pick her up last Friday.

Say hello to Wrigley:



Wrigley is a 2.5-year-old female Great Dane. She is on the small end for Dane height at 30" at the shoulder and she is very skinny right now. She is just a sweetheart, though. She follows me around whenever I'm home, and wanders the house looking for me when I leave (according to DH). She loves to play and has tons of energy--quite a contrast to our 10-year-old boxer mix. The dogs are getting along great, which was a major concern for us.



She's had very little training, so obedience class will be our first order of business. She is quite the wild woman at the moment--loves to chase bunnies, bark at neighbor dogs, and pull me around when she's out going potty. We're planning on putting in a fence once the ground thaws so that she can have more freedom to run around the yard. I'm just loving her right now and I'm so happy to have another big dog in the house.

Pre-cycle visit #1

I went in yesterday for the first of many pre-cycle visits. They drew 8 vials of blood for whatever tests the RE wanted to run before we cycle again--AMH, immunology labs, DHEA, testosterone, etc. I think they also drew stuff for the genetic screening lab that we will be using for any embryos this cycle.

They also did a resting follicle count and uterine artery doppler. She said my doppler results were fine, which I was a little worried about since I forgot they were doing it and had caffeine with breakfast. My right ovary has a nice cyst on it, which I think is still left over from the follicle the surgeon saw in December at my pre-op appointment. My total follicle count was 22, which is an increase from the 13 I had with my last cycle.

Who knows, maybe the meds and supplements are working after all?

Out!

I did it--I outed myself on Face.book. I've never spoken about our IF there and didn't really have much intention of bringing it up this way. Obviously, I couldn't talk about it there until after our families knew what was going on.

I always knew I would talk about it there, but I figured I would wait until NIAW or something. I guess it's the impending nature of IVF 2.0 that made me bring it up sooner. It was so hard to hide such an important life event the last time we went through this. I posted lots of vague sad things when we got our last BFN, and those who knew about the cycle knew why, but I think it worried others.

I must say that posting about it felt liberating. I was so nervous before I hit that "share" button, but it felt so freeing once it was out there. So many of us suffer in relative silence, sharing with those in the IF blogosphere, but not people in our lives. Blogging affords a large amount of anonymity, which is necessary when venting, crying, etc. is needed. I have no intention of sharing my blog address with the world, as I still feel that I need the safe space to get out the thoughts and feelings that aren't easy to even acknowledge, much less talk about. After all, the rest of the fertile world thinks that hope is an unqualified good thing, when we all know the double-edged sword that it brings. I don't want to have to explain that to people--I still need to be able to put it out there with a wonderful community who just "get it".

Still, the response to my FB "outing" was incredible. I was afraid I would get some negative comments or people telling me to keep it to myself. What I received was quite the opposite--within minutes, I had messages of love and support. I had 4 people respond that they had been through IF treatments, too--woohoo!--one outing leads to another! Not a single negative comment was left on my post.

I plan to continue posting about our IVF cycle on FB. I will try to ask for support when I need it from those who know me IRL, which is actually much harder than asking the IF blogosphere. I want to continue to put my story out there--who knows who might be helped by it?

Moving Forward

I went back today for my follow-up with the surgeon. I drove over 2 hours round trip for a measly 15-minute appointment. Essentially, I arrived, gave them my new insurance card, filled out a questionnaire on my surgery and recovery experiences, then met the doctor in the ultrasound room. A quick dildo-cam revealed that all seems to be healing well. No obvious fibroids that he could see, and no major hematomas in the uterus. He said we can proceed with our next IVF whenever we feel ready. After telling me to let him know if I get pregnant, I was out the door. It's a good thing I could stand to get a few things at a nearby Whole Paycheck so that the long trip wasn't a complete waste of time.

He did see some free blood because...AF finally arrived today!!! After 6 days of spotting (sure hope this is not a new trend), she arrived this morning full force. No cramping, though, which is lovely. With the surgeon's blessing, and CD1's arrival, I called the RE office to see where to go from here. When the IVF nurse called back on my drive home, she informed me that the RE wants to run a few more tests. After scheduling all of my tests (blood work, SSH, hysteroscopy, trial embryo transfer), she called in the prescription for my BCP's. I start them on Friday and take them for 21 days, then start stims on 3/6.

IVF 2.0, here we come!